The Need for Nurturing

Today I was in church and one of the nice older ladies in our ward came up to me and said, "Are you feeling okay? You look like you're not doing so well today." I told her I was a bit tired. However, I then wondered how she could see that. Did I have black under my eyes? Was my hair messy? Did my clothes look ragged?
I had to go to the powder room to make sure none of this was the case. I then noticed that although my hair wasn't that bad, it wasn't the way i would have preferred it, so I fixed it. I also decided to check down my throat. She wouldn't have been able to see that, of course, but my throat was sore and maybe people could tell that just from looking at me... Well I noticed something I didn't think was normal and decided to stop pretending that I was on top of things when I really wasn't. So, I went back to the chapel and listened to the announcements. I cried thinking of how much I needed for someone to notice that I wasn't feeling well and ask me how I was doing. It meant a lot to me. I was touched. I then began thinking of all the things that were going wrong in my life and in my family. I knew that path was not healthy though, so I did what I could to combat it. I noticed that I wasn't in the mood to sing the songs. This was NOT me. I always sing the songs and I hate it when people don't even try to sing. Now it was me not even trying to sing. Wow! REALLY? Adversarial pride at work, I suppose.
There was a High Councilman sitting up on the stand who is very musically inclined and he knew that I was too.
I knew that there was a dark force trying to get me down. It was now the sacrament song. I looked at the High Councilman and thought of who I really am. I though of what my mother would be doing if she was right beside me. I reclaimed myself and chose to sing the song. I chose to use the sacrament to really renew my baptismal covenants. I chose to pray for help and see the help. It was a matter of shifting my paradigm.
I shifted back into who I really was and started noticing something great! I was honest. I was real. I wasn't ashamed, though a little disappointed, and I looked at everyone else in a way that they didn't know how to respond to.
But the rest of church happened and I felt great! I allowed me to be me. I though about how much I needed someone to come up to me and tell me they were concerned and to remind me to take care of me. I needed the High Councilman's presence to remind me of who I really am and to be it. To just be me. The real me.
Then I thought, "How many times have I thought that I wasn't doing any good or helping out, when really it was just my presence that was needed?"
Thanking God for wisdom beyond my understanding.